My beloved kids... 11 years passed....

Here they are, my beloved kids some 11 years ago. This picture was taken just after we came back from performing our Haj. Those were the days when they were still small kids; Zaki only 10 years old, Zaid 5 years old and Sarah almost 2...

1st October 2013 - marked 5 years me being single and looking back, I think it was the best decision. As life goes on, being alone doesn't mean I need to be lonely. Life is too short to worry or ponder what might have been or to be sad over the lost years.

As I looked back at this picture, how much they have grown and how mature they have become, I felt blessed with these gifts; the kids I shared with A.I thanked A for giving the opportunity to become a mother and a wife for 19 years. But at least I am a mother forever....

Dear kids, my love for you is unconditional and please take care of yourselves.....

My Superheroes

My kids love superheroes movies, let it be Batman, Iron Man, Captain America... During our visit to Padang Besar, we found some masks and the kids were very excited. Being a fan of Batman myself, I bought all the masks for the kids.

We had a good time at my aunt's place, actually four days lazing around and eating... We went o Padang Besar twice coz they just couldn't get enough of browsing and shopping. I got myself some pots and pans and they got themselves loads of clothes... Hmm....

We are planning for another trip in November. This time we will fly to Bangkok for another shopping session.... Well, life is short. Live life to the fullest!!

To my superheroes, I love you all dearly....

Salam Syawal 2013

1 Syawal 2013... Marks my 5th year anniversary of singlehood. Alas, I survived 5 years alone without a partner and I am proud of it. And A has been married for more than 3 years now.... And I wish him happiness.

Mak passed away on 4 Ramadhan recently. I was by her side when she breathe the last breath. I attended her funeral and honestly, I was glad that we made peace. The last few months when she was ill, I met her a few times. I seek for her forgiveness for all the years when I was "attached" to her son.


I am all alone on this raya. Since A lost his mother recently, I offered my "turn" to him as he is only here for a couple of days. He will be going back to JB with his wife and her kids. I on the hand will go up north with my kids....

Selamat Hari Raya to all....

Post GE13

Alhamdulillah. The waiting is over. Finally GE13 came on 5/5/13 and all the hard work pays off... After months of waiting and preparing, the results was sweet... At least for Selangor... I hope it will stay this way for a long time.

Even though I was not fully involved in the campaign, my task as a teacher, I still have to educate the students regarding the fight for justice. To all my students, I tried to explain the meaning of independence and how important justice is to the world. We need to live in a country with minimal bribery, injustice, racism, crime etc, in which Islam is able to provide. I suppose the messages which I was trying to convey to the students really made them support my judgement. As soon as the results of GE was announced, I received calls and messages from my students congratulating me.... As if I was the one who was elected....

To me the students are the assets of the nation as in 5 years time, they are eligible to vote and by then, they have seen the better side of the current government. We discussed about politics in our classes as I need to know, what the next generation's expectation. They may be young but they are able to think and decide for their future.

Well... Since the GE13 is over, back to work then, preparing for GE14....

Praying for Mak

I was informed by A that his mother was under the weather and was admitted into a private hospital last Monday. She had to undergo some further check-up as she was in constant pain. When I met her two weeks ago, she was complaining about her pain but I thought that it was her normal ailment. When the result came out, A asked me to visit her if I have time. Not knowing the whole truth about the sickness, I asked him again. He finally told me that his mother has stage 4 cancer.

I was shocked... I wish I could visit her at the hospital but I know it is not advisable. He himself is against the idea as I don't want to hurt his wife's feelings but to think of it, I am still the daughter in law even though I am no longer married to him. As the ties between me and his parents is unbreakable, I am still legally their daughter.

She has to be admitted into another government hospital soon and before she goes there, I will pay her a visit with my kids. I pray that she will recover and may Allah bless her with good health....

The Promise

A book titled The Promise by Danielle Steel, a book that I read during my school days. And in 1981, the movie came. I remembered taking the train to Penang from Ipoh to see the movie alone. It was a wonderful movie and very touching....

Recently, I downloaded the movie and watched it again after more than 30 years watching it at the cinema. I can still recall the storyline and it still touch my heart.... I guess the story reflect what I hope in life and the promise made not to be broken.

This weekend is my movie day; not having the kids at home and lazing alone watching movies... What a wonderful weekend, less stress and no worries!

An unexpected visit

Finally after almost 5 years, I eventually went to my in-laws home to pay them a visit. What prompted me? My dad in-law celebrated his birthday last week and during Sarah's visit to their house recently, he asked for a present from me. She came back and told me and of course I was shocked! Didn't expect that at all! At spur of the moment I decided to buy something and first I thought I would get the kids to pass the gifts to them. However, after thinking hard, I decided to send them myself.

My heart was throbbing fast as I drove to their place... The once familiar route I had travelled seemed far and the thought of being in that house almost chickened me out. But I pulled my courage and continued my journey to their house... In my heart, I was praying that nobody else would be at home except for his parents....

With couple of gifts and two packets of chicken chops in hand, I arrived. As I stepped into the house, I can still feel the awkward feeling; not wanted and not welcomed...; but I remained calm. I am just there to give their presents and after half an hour, I was already on my way out.... The meeting turned out okay and no harsh words being exchanged between us.

A didn't call me about the visit as I expected his parents would have called him to inform. Perhaps he wouldn't mind. He had hinted to me a couple of times to go to his parents house to pick up Sarah and I refused. The visit ended my fears of "what if" and I thank God nothing worse had happened. I had performed my duty as a daughter and I pray that all will end well in the future....