Happy birthday boys...

Zaid turned 15 today. And Zaki will be 20 in two days time. Suddenly the kids are grown up and soon they will leave the nest. Somehow or rather they are already away with Zaki at college and Zaid in boarding school. With Sarah alone with me, life is a bit quiet. Sarah prefer to be alone and minding her own things. At times I am all alone at home and I can feel at ease. I can do my beading, reading and thinking (?).... I need to plan my moves for at least three years ahead. I need to evaluate my current situation and make new plans for the future. I pray that my kids will turn out excellent in the future and they will appreciate what I have done for them. All I wanted them to know is why I chose my present life now. They need to understand that the outcome is more important. I always pray that the kids would appreciate each other and be responsible towards each other. Life is so short to worry about the unnecessary things.... Make the best of what we have and live life to the fullest!! Finally happy birthday to Zaid and Zaki.... Ibu love you....

My Fourth Year Anniversary

It is the first day of Syawal 2012. And it had been 4 years being single. How could anyone forget your divorce anniversary if it falls on 1st of Syawal? How am I feeling now? Actually whenever Syawal is approaching, the memories of Syawal 2008 kept on lingering in my mind... I can still hear and feel the same and I hate feeling like this. How could somebody spoil your raya... As though there are no other days.... There are 365 days in a year and he chose 1 Syawal.... Hmmmmm..... I think I should celebrate my fourth year as I survived 4 years being single. I think it is a victory that I could survive on my own.... Come what may, selamat hari raya to all....

Sarah turned 12 - 2012

My dear Sarah turned 12 on 5th July 2012. How time flies and suddenly all the kids are grown-ups. Looking back, it felt so fast raising all these three kids... Or perhaps I am the one getting old.... But still, I am proud of all of them, Zaki in U, Zaid at his boarding school and Sarah growing up at her own pace. Today, mother and daughter went for a similar hair-cut. We had Secret Recipe cakes and celebrate her birthday together quietly... She did asked for a birthday bash but since both boys are not around, I thought I should postpone her party. Wait until both of the boys are back and maybe plan something for Sarah. As Ramadhan is approaching, perhaps we would have a small gathering with friends.... Sarah's birthday and welcoming Ramadhan. Happy birthday, dear Sarah.... I love you dearly....

Making decisions...

We were in Australia for a week during mid May. The weather was excellent and the kids really enjoyed their break. I had a wonderful time too. Sarah attended her therapy at Brisbane and I attended a seminar. It was a fruitful trip. Eventhough we had limited time, we tried to visit the important places as scheduled. While I was there, I felt like I needed to think outside the box, go beyond my comfort zone and decide on what's best for me and Sarah. After some discussion with a friend, I am looking into furthering my studies and start a new life elsewhere. Being contented as where I am now, it's no longer a challenge to be here. I need to broaden my horizon and step into a new environment where people are not judgemental and to be honest, there's nothing to look forward here, now! I just want to close my book here and open a new leaf other than this place.... Not that I don't like my present life, it had been wonderful since I lived on my own (with the kids)... But the environment is no longer conducive for me and Sarah. We need a new place, new people and new surroundings.... Therefore I need to decide what's best for me and Sarah's future. I need to calculate, evaluate and decide.....

Happy birthday to me....

Today, February 3 is my birthday. I am older today but who cares about the number... Alhamdulillah for the good years and I hope for the best to come....

Today I spent the whole morning at Shah Alam attending a meeting. What a way to celebrate a birthday!! Thus it was fun coz met some friends. I had to rush after the meeting for Sarah's piano class and tonight I have to assist in the office.... Wow!! A very2 busy day for me....

This is my 4th birthday after the divorce and it's okay. I don't miss being married as my current life is eventful and meaningful. I see my kids grow up and I am happy with their development. With my busy schedule, I have little time to think of finding a mate... Not now.... There's so much to do and I pray that Allah would give the strength to fulfil all my dreams, insyaAllah....

To my kids, thank you for making my life worthwhile... Take good care of yourselves and I love you all very much....

Happy 2012 to all.

Happy new year everyone! Hope that 2012 would be better than 2011 for all... As for me, 2011 was fairly good to me even though there were some unfortunate events. I manage to pull through and I thanked Allah for giving me the strength and wisdom.

2012.... Please be good to me... New resolutions? I doubt so, I don't think I have any. Just continue with the old ones, I suppose.I wish to travel a bit this year. I have planned but subject to $$$$$$. That means I have to work harder to pursue my dream. As the kids are growing older, I may want to concentrate on my life, giving myself more time and travel before I get too old for globe-trotting....

To my kids, study hard and be good. To all my friends, may Allah bless you always and may all your dreams come true.....

Holiday blues...

We were in HK last June and it was summer. It was hot but fun! For this holidays, as I have not decided where to go yet, looking at my old holidays pics would make me make up my mind.... Bangkok? Langkawi? HK again? HMC? Where to go....

As all the kids are currently not with me now, I cant discuss with them. If only I have tons of money, then I dont have problem deciding. My main problem is I have to travel on tight budget. Well... this year alone I was in Vietnam, twice in Singapore and once in HK....

I have a few days more to think.... Urrmmm.....